John P Klasey

He was a mean father. But long before I was born, he became a mushy-hearted grandfather. Say hello and I love you and his eyes would start leaking from the joy of being close to those dear to him. Never have I met another man so in love with his family. How does one so cantankerous and surly become this compassionate, sweet, tender old man? The patriarch of the Walls/Klasey family is dead, which just seems so bizarre! My grandfather cheated death so many times I thought he'd stick around for a lot longer. I'm happy for him though, because he was entirely ready to blow this popsicle stand.

http://legacy.suntimes.com/ChicagoSunTimes/DeathNotices.asp?Page=LifeStory&PersonID=124529481

bonjour sarah

well hello! I would like to have sex. Right now. hot, steamy, passionate, falling-in-love sex. I want this with my husband. But I'm afraid that's just not going to happen. I would love for him to get his sex drive back...

A pound of this, a pound of that

I had a hankering for a sweet and simple dessert the other day, and wanted to try something I hadn't made before. I settled on a pound cake recipe from Cook's Illustrated, the best cooking magazine in the whole wide world. It was a laborious recipe but not overly difficult. It turned out superbly. D, who loves pound cake, said it was the best pound cake he'd ever had. I even whipped up some heavy cream for fresh whipped cream to go with it and the blueberries I'd just bought. I love being able to cook on the spur of the moment like this, and I can only do it when I keep some semblance of order and cleanliness in the kitchen. That way it's an opposite-of-stressful event. See me be happy!

Sleeping Late

I made a delicious and lovely carrot cake on Friday for a dear family friend who has cancer. I love being able to tweak recipes in little ways that make all the difference; being confident enough in my baking skills to add just a splash more of vanilla, a pinch of allspice, and so on. It makes me feel like I've accomplished something, a rare feeling these days. I have managed to keep certain parts of the house clean for a week straight, which is remarkable considering how messy we both are. I'm really happy when I can wake up to a clean kitchen sink and a closet floor that isn't an obstacle course I have to navigate on my way to the bathroom. It puts me in a saner frame of mind. So today is a good one, despite my having slept deliciously late...

Bride and Groom and Happily Ever After

My friend Heather's shower was today, and it was so delightful! I'm a bridesmaid, my first time at that. Everything one could imagine a bridal shower as being, with all the kooky decorations and shower games and the likes. I had a total blast! Also, I hooked up with one of her fiance's aunts, who is Indian, and is going to send me all kinds of recipes from her family, like homemade mango chutney! I am so incredibly pumped. However, D was upset when I got home and I ended up not going to a meeting. I am going to try again tomorrow...and my mom is coming over to help me organize my bedroom and ginormous closet, so that's super. I hold my head up towards the sky and shout "Show me myself!" You know what's sad and weird and scary? Half of the people you know who get married will wind up getting divorced...tmth!

the next right thing

I'm going to an al-anon meeting tomorrow. End the cycle, stop it dead in its' tracks. I am very excited about being in a room filled with people who have been right where I am and therefore not having to explain that underneath it all I deeply, truly love my husband. I need to hear that I am not a freak for this and that I can manage to pull myself out of the wreckage even if I can do nothing for him. ouch. Rediscovering the possibilities of a girl named Sarah, day 1.

bad movies abound

We went to see Cloverfield tonight, and I sincerely hope it does not spawn a host of copycat films. Apparently some ad execs and cinema verite 'dudes' decided to make a movie with no real plot or character study and see how far their 'totally sick computer graphics' could get them. Gag me!! At least Blair Witch Project (which Cloverfield is being compared to) was scary the first time you saw it. I'm generally sick of mainstream blah mass-appeal movies. Not to be a movie snob or anything, but sometimes my brain gets hungry for more than a cheap laugh. I made a deal with D that we would start watching one classic or foreign film together per month (chosen by me) and we would listen to one piece of composed music per month (chosen by him). Excellent plan, no? Thus far it has yet to be enacted, as it has been, to quote my dear, "not the right time. I want something I don't have to think about." So I will slowly get mushified until we can start our new program...

After being broke

I can't stand not having a job at this point. I love my embroidery and needlework, but I need to be making some sort of contribution other than housekeeping if only because the cooking, cleaning, laundry, grocery shopping etc goes largely unnoticed. I feel like crawling out of my skin sometimes! Friday was Dave's last day of school; he has almost an entire month off! Now I know I have to somewhat pace myself when it comes to wanting to spend time with him. He's very touchy lately and seems to play along only begrudgingly. He is sure, naturally, to let me know what a great sacrifice he's making by going grocery shopping with me even though I didn't ask him to go. I thought I was supposed to be the passive aggressive one in this relationship. I hope I'm not rubbing off on him in that way! I wish I could figure out this whole marriage thing...

really now

Housewarming party this Sunday! Who's freaking out about all the cleaning? Because it's an open house, I'm not sure how much cooking I'll be doing; I believe some sort of antipasto setup will be lovely though. Dave has a huge midterm on Friday, so he's not much help around the house, which I mostly understand. It's his very first PhD test, so he's bound to be nervous. I still haven't found a job, although I haven't been trying uber hard. I always seem to be behind in one thing or another, and playing this game of constant catch-up is making me pooped!

real life

I need to write a resume. I always feel paralized when it comes to these things. Not that I haven't written a million already, but it's just difficult for me. I'm certain a large part of it has to do with the feeling that if I don't actually try then I can't fail, can't be rejected from a crappy job that I'm way over-qualified for anyway. Healthy and lofty ambitions, huh?